GOSHHHHHH.

i don't want to use the fucking S word.
but im feeling all so fucked up now.

i know, even if its a sunday, i can just give it a try. but all i did was just stay at home and wait for them to reply my emails, WHICH FUCKING NONE OF THEM DID. i could have send out emails to them again, but i chose not to, i sat at home and watched gossip girl instead. OH HOW FUCKING COOL IS THIS.

oh come on, someone just tell me what i should do.
i made it a big responsibility for myself to finish this whole damn thing, but im fucking stuck stuck stuck. worst thing is that im not even halfway there.

yeah, everything's not about me. so i just want to throw everything back to where it came from.
HOLY SHIT. its just a month away only.
i am really really sorry if i caused any delay.
oh fuck it.
why is it that i am having sleepless night?
i really want to throw everything back, but even this last step is making me feeling so bloody
guilty.

GOD DAMN IT.
its not just one.
THERE'S TWO.
FREAKING HELL TWO.
i don't understand, i simply don't.
oh fuck it.
just fuck it.
fuck the world out there.

suddenly at this fucking moment, i wished i had fucking learnt black magic.
to finish off this fucking whole damn thing.

and i swear, it wasn't as easy as what we think.
ITS EASIER SAID THAN DONE.
like who fucking don't know?

the last fucking thing i want to know now is that i've got the easiest and most relaxed responsibility to carry.

im just dumb enough, that i can't be as great as the people out there.
im inexperienced, and im willing to learn, but i just couldn't fucking do it.
i don't know what else is left for me to do then. fuck fuck fuck.

omg, someone just tell me i am not going to cause a big WOOHA because of my stupidity!